Monday, January 29, 2007

First there is sex

First there is sex.

And there there is stupidity.

No, I'm not gonna be preaching about the act of engaging in premarital sex. It doesn't take an Einstein to know that Tom, Jane and Mary are shagging, all 3 together if that satisfies your carnal desires.

But what is it with girls who don't take precautions? And then lament about being late and have sleepless nights fearing a pregnancy.

Ladies, forget the men will you? It's your body. And just the same way you keep your money in your own bank account and not someone else's, why don't you take responsibility of your own body and not leave it to the men?

"He doesn't have condoms..."

A lot of girlfriends give me this excuse, a lame one I might add. For heaven's sake! What era are you living in woman? If you want to shag as much as he does, you too can be the one supplying the rubbers. Heck, for all he cares, he just wants to shag. He ain't the one getting pregnant and having to lug something around for 9 months!

"You mean, I buy condoms from the shop?"

No, why don't you order it via e-bay and have it delivered to your house. I cannot, repeat - CANNOT stand girls who want to shag but cannot walk into a pharmacy or a 7-11 to buy a pack of condoms. Oh, you think buying condoms is shameful is it? Wait till your grandmother hears about you getting jiggy under the covers while she was knitting in the room next door. Come on, what's so embarassing about walking into 7-11 and getting a pack of 3s? OK fine, grab a can of drink or a box of Clorets and pay for it together with your pack of Playsafe. Then maybe you won't look like you're just out to get condoms to rush home to shag like rabbits.

"He says he can pull it out in time!"

You are obviously one clueless chick. Did you know that pre-cum can impregnate you too? That liquid that oozes out from his penis prior to actual ejaculation? Yes, that has sperm too. And they'll be having a party swimming up your uterus looking for your egg. Even a penis ring shouldn't fool you!

"I have morning after pills..."

So you only shag 4 times a month is it? Because that's the limit for one consuming these pills? Morning after pills messes with your system BIG time sister! And they should only be used during emergency cases, and "Aiya, no condoms!" is not an emergency. I'm too lazy google and give you scientific and factual accounts of how it messes with your body, but all I know is that excessive use of morning after pills screws with your fertility. You may not be able to conceive when you eventually want to.

"I dunno..."

Whaddya mean you don't know? Don't know still want to shag? I've had girlfriends say this to me when I asked them why didn't they use protection. What the fuck you don't know? This is truly stupidity at its peak!

"He doesn't want to use it..."

Get him to wank, you roll over and sleep. End of story.

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Girlfriends, sisters - if it's not ON, the answer is NO.

Posted by Doreen at 4:38 pm