Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Eventually a best-seller

My demo is now safe at the Star Rfm office. When the recording and all the mixing was done, I thought it was a bloody good demo! I was so proud of it, and I couldn't contain my excitement! I was just brimming with smiles and feeling damn proud of myself.

Well, then the excitement slowly faded off. I am now filled with anxiety and nervousness - Will I make it? Will they listen to the first few seconds and then chuck it aside cos they think I'm just mediocre? I wonder when will they make a decision?

Then of course, while at their office yesterday, Suveea asked if I wanted to go see Blue cos she's got a pair of extra tickets. Not a big fan of them, but what have I got to lose. It'll be good to check out the stage, sound and lights.

So I went with Elaine. It was just a so-so concert.. Nothing to shout about, even the crowd was not exactly hyped up. Sure, the lights and the sound system were damn impressive! All the moving heads, the spotlights, and phwoar.. their amps were solid stuff! But a boy band! You would expect them teenage girls to be screaming their heads off yeah?

But I mean, honestly, what can you expect? They name themselves after a primary colour for chrissakes! Showmanship could do with some improving... Outfit - so very typical - black tee and blue jeans, and of course, when these foreign bands put up a show in Malaysia, all they can say is "Apa khabar Malaysia!!" Come on, we need something else if you really want to win our hearts!

And that Derek McDonald dude who did the opening act for them was even worse. He took a towel, rubbed it over his body to wipe off all the sweat and then threw it to the crowd. Ewk. Good looking, but too vain for my liking. Poor sod.

Menstrual cramps are the worse thing to be dealing with when I've got to do the FA for a press advertisement when my designer is not around. All I needed to do then was lie in bed with a hot water bottle over my tummy, but of course, all I had was Anderson sitting by my side - "OK.. ah.. yeah.. enlarge that image.. squeeze all the text up there a wee bit.. OK.. remember to send to Andy.. and get Ms. Lim to translate it for us..."

Last night, curled in bed with my laptop on my uh.. lap? HAHAH. Reading through some of my past writings. I have a whole lot of unfinished businesses, or rather, writings. Every single one of them - I started writing them with a vision - that it will become a best-seller *chuckles* Of course, somewhere along the line, I realized it's not gonna happen, or that motivation went downhill.

But it was all a good read. I always enjoy reading thru past works. It tells me about me then, about what's going on in my head, what's important to me then, etc. Haven't been writing much in the past 2 years - the last unfinished one I wrote was a few months before I started working full time.

Well, really ought to get back to it. One of these days, one of my writings will make it thru to the last page, the last paragraph, the last sentence and of course the last fullstop. That will be a best-seller *chuckles*

Hey I need to motivate myself don't I?

Posted by Doreen at 4:50 pm



    

Saturday, September 25, 2004

CSI vs PDRM

A crime has been committed. Yet the authorities claim they can't do nothing. Of course you can! Don't you watch CSI? Screw the cops here. I mean the most common way to solve a crime would be fingerprints right? But no. They think it pointless.

Probably because I'm driving a Kenari. Probably because I didn't lose much. But a crime is a crime. Not just because an individual didn't suffer much losses, then you don't bother to investigate further! When a crime is solved, it will stop that criminal from repeating it. It will also act as a deterrent to others who have thought of committing the same crime.

Bloody hell. All you did was take pictures of my car with the window smashed to pieces. What good is that? There was a witness who spotted the one of the number plate of the motorcycle, but when they ran a search for the number - it was a number owned by a Chinese dude who drives a Kancil. Stolen number plate. Stolen car. Whichever. So why don't you brush my car for fingerprints? You'll get something won't you? They smashed my windows, meddled with my locks on both fucking sides of the door. They open up my glove compartment. They took my little coin drawer thingie. There has to be a fingerprint somewhere!

And screw the rainy weather. With one window smashed, I've got to stick plastic over that space to prevent the rain from coming in and soaking my seats.

Bloody assholes. Does it take 6 men on 3 motorcycles to smash one measly car window of a measly Kenari? And 6 guys got away with a pair of my cheap sunglasses and some coins. Thrilling wasn't it?

Thank goodness my CDs were all still there, else I'll be even more crushed. Thank god they didn't take the audio player. But damn, you know it's just the hassle of it all! I spent a good 1.5 hours in the police station with Al. Both stoning at 5 in the morning. But no luck with anything.

Screw you who did this to my car. It was really my baby. I love it to pieces. I was so crushed when I saw the pieces of shattered glass all over my seats and on the road. Screw your whole damn family too. I hope you crash on your stupid bike. Better still, I hope you get run over by a huge trailer, and get dragged for miles under the trailer's huge tyres.

Any lottery freaks out there who are thinking "Give me the numbers you fool!".. Well mine's 6128 and the allegedly stolen number plate was 1195. Maybe I should make this my first lottery bet. Go ahead - be a superstitious Chinese and buy these two numbers from all the lottery shops. What have I got to lose now?

Shit. My mind is blank. I haven't slept a wink since last night. Gonna rush off to Kajang for a 4-hour DJing stint after this.

Big great thanks goes to Al.. and of course Resh.. Resh IS the man. Don't know what I'll do without them both.

Sigh. What's done is done. It's over. Move on Doreen. Stop harping. But wait, I would like to end this by saying, "I hope you all burn in hell for smashing my window!"

There you go. I feel much better now. Of course, I don't really mean it you see. But it just feels good saying it.

Posted by Doreen at 11:46 am



    

Friday, September 24, 2004

Much Ado About Doreen...

What Inspires You?
Doreen, you're inspired by Being a Trailblazer
Were you the kind of kid who was always starting up lemonade stands or selling candy bars door-to-door? Even if you weren't an early entrepreneur you definitely like doing things your own way. And why shouldn't you? There's a huge rush when taking (somewhat calculated) risks and heading into uncharted territory - whether that means starting your own business, or just heading to some underdeveloped mystical and magical vacation spot. With your creativity, vision, and loads of leadership skills, you're a natural at knowing how to get everyone - your friends, your family, or your co-workers - on board with your plans. Of course, that probably also has to do with that positive vibe you're projecting. So keep moving to your own beat. With a pulse as strong as yours, others are sure to follow.

What's Your Vibe?
Doreen, your vibe is Burgundy Chic
You're one class act - the perfect balance of a cool, casual attitude and an elegant, polished style. There's a certain grace in almost everything you do. It's true, you make things look easy - even when they're not.

And while there's nothing flashy about how you present yourself, you never fail to dazzle most people you meet. You tend to take life as it comes - and it's not easy to throw you off course. A strong sense of self and a hearty dose of confidence help you handle whatever comes your way. And usually, look good doing it.


Who's Your Music Match?
Doreen, your music match is a Hot Hip-Hopper
The world of hip-hop won't be the same after you bust on the scene. With your unique blend of personality and upbeat energy, you put a new spin on anything just like your music match Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas. Spontaneous and energetic, you have a good time mixing it up. Whether you're hanging with your girls, shopping at the mall, or chilling at home, you know how to liven up even the dullest of moments. All your friends know that there's no such thing as boring when you're around. You're like a breath of fresh air who makes the same old, same old seem totally new. And that's how you get the party started!

What's Your Signature City?
Doreen, your signature city is Los Angeles
Lights, camera, action! A mover and shaker like you will enjoy being front and center in a scene that has lots of things to do and plenty of places to go. Maybe you also like to treat yourself to a little pampering every now and again. Who wouldn't? From new purchases to a personal trainer to a massage or spa treatment, a little luxury now and again doesn't feel too bad, now does it? Distinctive tastes like yours would have a field day in star-studded, sun-soaked Los Angeles. Whether you're shopping on Rodeo Drive, going out with friends on the Sunset Strip, or taking in the sights of Hollywood, the City of Angels is packed with tons of attractions that are right up your cutting-edge alley. From the beautiful beaches to its glamorous inhabitants, you'll feel right at home in your signature city.

Posted by Doreen at 5:09 pm



    

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Excessive Tartar

So I was reading Jordan's blog with his latest entry being "Hi, it's me, I missed the train".. HAHA. Anyways, he was commenting about how a dead man called his family when they were mourning for him thinking that he was run over by a train.

So I read up the news here, but didn't find it quite amusing cos I've heard about stuff like that happening before.. You know, the dead coming back to live and all, turns out it's human error or some misunderstanding and miscommunication along the way.

That is till I got to the end.

Toronto police are now looking for the true identity of the victim. They describe the dead man as white, six feet tall, 180 lbs., age 40-45, with receding short brownish red hair, a beard and extensive tartar build up on his teeth.

EXTENSIVE TARTAR BUILD UP ON HIS TEETH! HAHAHA. Yucks! Super gross!

It's Thursday.. yet I'm not exactly looking forward to the weekend knowing that I'm working for 2 days again on Saturday and Sunday. Hmmm. All this extra work IS taking a toll on me. OK, so initially I thought, "It can't be that hard - you just step up to the mic and talk and talk... I mean, c'mon, you don't use up that much of energy!" Now I know otherwise.

But I need to do it.

For money.

For experience.

For exposure.

Posted by Doreen at 4:54 pm



    

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Of farewells and pee...

Just like how you don't like to sit around in period-soaked panties, I dislike sitting on pee-stained toilet seats. Let's work towards a pee-free toilet seat girls!


Yours truly will print this note out and stick it behind the doors of all the toilet stalls for the Ladies on the third floor. I'm so annoyed at going to the toilet and finding pee all over the toilet seat! I thought only the men end up doing that cos well, maybe some have big dicks, and find it impossible to manouvre their willies to aim accurately into the toilet bowl.

But you find pee-stained toilet seats in the ladies! The toilet seat we have here is usually clean and dry, so why don't you just sit on it? Why must you hover above the seat, and then end up getting pee all over it? Damn, I don't care how you pee, but if you get your yellow liquid on the toilet seat, at least have the god damn decency to wipe it clean before the next person walks in!

Anyways, I was reading the papers today.. In the Youth section in Star Two, there was a very nice piece written by this girl. Entitled "Farewell, my pal", it starts off like this -- "I recently found out that a long-lost friend of mine died nearly a year ago. He had hung himself. Jonathan Brandis was 27 with a whole wide world in front of him but times were tough in his line of work. The last I saw him, he was smiling at me from the pages of a magazine. He was so popular then, gracing the cover of practically every teenybopper magazine in the market. I don't think many remember him now though".

At first thought, I was like, "The Jonathan Brandis?" My strongest memory of him was from SeaQuest and also in Sidekick alongside Chuck Norris.

This article was a tribute written by the writer to Jonathan Brandis. It spoke a little bit about his past works, and her craze over him as a high school girl. Remember those days when we would buy them teenybopper mags and the centrefold is usually some cute looking actor, and how we would stick them posters up in our bedroom walls? She spoke of those.. and it all felt so easy to relate to. Felt so much warmth reading her words. Plus, I used to like Jonathan too!

So there, it saddened me to find out that Jonathan had hung himself, with no suicide note left behind. Needless to say, the whole world is mystified about his decision to commit suicide.



The writer ended by saying -- "I never knew Jonathan Brandis as a person, but he is immortalised in these magazine pages. To my dearest friend, Jon... goodbye".

It's perfect. I feel it. I can relate to it. This is a damn good piece of writing, simple words and all.

However, it felt a little bit funny at the end. Jonathan Brandis was 27 when he committed suicide. 27 last year. It took a while before the age finally sunk in. Has it been that long since MY teenybopper days? Gosh. I used to remember him as a cheery-faced wide-smiled Jonathan of 16 or 17 years of age!

Gee. Not only am I saddened by his death, I am further devastated that I'm getting old.

Posted by Doreen at 1:52 pm



    

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Sushi

The other day while at work at Bukit Raja Shopping Centre, I bought sushi and sat out in foyer to eat while I people watch and since it's pretty cooling because it had just stopped raining then.

A Malay couple sat at the bench next to mine - young, probably around 17 or 18. Girl was nagging at boyfriend about something or the other, so boyfriend turned away and looked off into the distance. The girlfriend uttered something like, "You're not going home are you? Fine then, I'll take a bus home!"

But she still sat there. She meddled with her mobile phone for a few moments, and then slid her hands under his arm. "Sorry bang, marah ke?" (read: Sorry honey, are you mad at me?" in her most childlike voice.

Goddamit. Where is your pride girl? You just shouted at him and told him you were gonna take the bus home! Why don't you just get up, leave and catch your stupid bus home? It is because of girls like this that men think they are more powerful, more superior. Heck. It's a small matter. But it sure as hell got me annoyed. But luckily that didn't affect the taste of my sushi.

The weekend has been good. I've got people come up to me and asked me about my DJing charges and my contact number - at both places! While I was at 1U, a lady who's a Marketing person from Popular came and told me they always organise events and roadshows and could use a bilingual, or even trilingual DJ/MC. Then while at Bukit Raja, two men came to me and asked me for a card and if I'm doing this full time, or merely freelancing. Woo hoo. I'm getting noticed!

The underwriting signing ceremony for the client went really well yesterday. Guess what was the main attraction? The multimedia presentation. Guess who did the voice-over? Muahaha. Me.

Anyways, as I sat there at the Press Reception desk, making sure I give out press kits and souvenirs to all the journalists that came, and also making sure they get my name card and being nice and all to them. I thought to myself a few times, "YUCK. This is so not me. What was all that garbage that I just said to them? All with an oh-so-fake smile!"

"Oh hiiiiiiii! Thanks for coming yeah! Makan already? Aiyor, what a nice dress!"

Damn. I don't care if you've had lunch. And I think that is the most hideous dress that you are wearing! But of course, I'm getting paid. The company is getting paid for the job.

And then when I went into the bathroom at the hotel, a few of the Merchant bank's Public Affairs staff were there.. they busily powdered their face and reapplied lipstick, while waving their cigarettes in the air and bitching about God knows what.

Well, that's your PR ladies.. Hmm, I then also thought about Samantha from Sex & The City. Muahahaha. Wild sex maniac.

Posted by Doreen at 4:06 pm



    

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Some Wet Thoughts...

... pun intended... *grins*



Big fat raindrops continue splashing down. As I stood by the window, I saw streams of water cascading downhill on the tar road. My red little car stood solitary on that stretch of road, alone, in the cold as the raindrops incessantly continued pouring from the skies above. Poor car.



It would be nice to now cuddle in bed with a good book (or man!) and a cuppa. It would be blissful to soak in a hot tub with an ice cold beer in my hands! Or indulge by running in the outdoors and playing in the rain.

Anything but being trapped here in the office. Or being trapped in the insanity of the traffic congestion out on the roads for that matter.

Posted by Doreen at 6:50 pm



    

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Apocalypse



Milla is so hot. So, so, so, so H-O-T-T.

Posted by Doreen at 1:22 pm



    

Monday, September 13, 2004

Worms on Monster's Head!

When the alarm sprang to life at 8 this morning, I dreaded coming to work - suddenly reality hit me hard in the face. It's Monday morning and I've got to go to work. She will be there sitting at her desk right in front of me. I dread seeing her. I dread having her all smiley and pretending to be nice when she's not!

But what the heck. If I don't wanna have to face people like her, then I might as well not work for the rest of my life. So I braced myself, wore all black (it gives me confidence) and strut into the office cheery and wished everyone good morning.

I saw the mob of curly black hair on her head turn into worms and they crawled all over her head, them black squiggly creepy crawlies. I saw her fangs as she smiled at me. It glinted under the light and I thought I saw a drop of blood at the tip of one fang. When she said good morning, I heard a sinister evil laugh. But it's OK. As ugly as she looked, and as scaredy-cat as I am, this is one monster I will learn to not be afraid of.

The day has gone by rather well.. Our paths did not cross much. Anderson hasn't yet said anything to me regarding the email I sent to him. Maybe he's just lying low and observing for a while. I hope he is. Please, please make him do something to improve the situation... I hate the feeling of coming to work everyday having to watch my back like that.

But I'm sure it'll be OK. In time. I've got a bunch of good people at work, angels in disguise, and I'm sure they all know who they are. With them around, the monster don't seem to be so scary anymore.

Posted by Doreen at 5:52 pm



    

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Dear Anderson...

Dear Anderson,

First of all - I don't want to be seen as a spoiled brat by complaining about every little single thing to you, but I really don't want to have to watch my back day in, day out as I come to work in the office.

I am happy working here, and I hate that feeling of us fighting among ourselves and hope that everyone - you, Fresa, Isaac, Lalitha and myself - despite the amount of work and stress we are under - can still be a happy team who is always supportive of one another.

For the past 2 weeks maybe, I have been having problems with Lalitha. Somehow we don't see eye to eye anymore. But I didn't quite take that matter seriously. I thought, "I'm sure it's normal that everyone has got their own ideas on how to work things out" So I went back to acting normal.

I don't know if you know me - I'm actually quite a simple person. I just want to work, take home my pay, get along well with people I work with, and then go out party on the weekends! So when it's obvious politics and backstabbing is so apparent and right smack in my face - I want to ignore it all and hope it can go away, but honestly, it won't. Yet, at the same time, I don't want to have a bomb set off by someone explode in my face and yet I still don't know that I'm dead. Do you know what I mean?

1. When Ms. Lim from Sin Chew called last, last week regarding the wrong ad size that we sent in, she said something like, "But I asked you and you said it was STAR's size!" I would never have said that. STAR and Sin Chew have never have the same ad sizes - I would know. I know this like the back of my hand. I go to sleep, and when I wake up, I can even tell you that STAR is 24x5 and Sin Chew 26x6. But she insisted that I told her that. And the best part, she insisted that the conversation took place 2 days ago, and the problem is - I don't even remember having this conversation with her.

She says she's new. Fine. But these are the ground rules of the house that you should pick up fast! One month is not new is it? I'm not asking you to list down the programmes of UCSI, but merely the ad sizes! I'm not putting the blame on her yet for sending the wrong ad size, but just the fact that she was SO DAMN QUICK to point the finger at me.

2. Fresa asked me 2 days ago, "Eh, you were out of the office for 2 whole days, weren't you going around with Lalitha for the photoshoot?" I said "Yes, of course, why did you ask?"

Fresa's reply was - "Lalitha told me she handled the photo shoot all by herself for the past 2 days, that's why her leg muscles were cramped from running here and there by herself. So I was wondering how come you weren't with her since you were out of the office for so long hours"

I know this trivial - but trying to make other colleagues see that all the credit belongs to her when something was done by two people? I don't think this is right at all. Something goes wrong - she quickly points a finger at me. Something goes well, she goes around telling people that she did it all by herself.

3. Friday morning when I came into the office for a little while, I asked her if she has called Kristal yet. She mumbled something and said that she has. So fine, I'll let her handle it. But around 11, Kristal called me and asked me for the ad. I said, "Eh? Didn't my colleague Lalitha call you yet?" Kristal said no one called her. She said, quickly get the ad out by 12! That was when I messaged both of you.

4. By 4pm, the ad still is not ready - but I don't know what Kristal promised Lalitha, or the time extension given. I called Fresa to see how things were at the office, she said she's waiting for the Chinese translation to be sent over.

So we chatted for a bit, and that's when Fresa asked me, "How come you didn't tell Lalitha of the deadline?" I was shocked. I asked her what she meant. She said Lalitha told her this is so rush because Doreen only told her of the ad a few days ago!"

This is COMPLETELY INSANE. This is NOT the story at all. Remember how we told Marketing that the ad for China Press on the 12th will be the last of the International ad? But no, somehow at the last minute, she didn't want the International ad to come out anymore, not even on the 12th as per agreed by Marketing.

And I only told her of the deadline a few days ago? Hello? The September Media planner is stuck on the wall in our office.

5. At 6:30pm, she sms-ed me asking me for the password to log on to my computer. I didn't reply. I called Fresa. Fresa said she wanted to use my email to send it out to China Press. Why I don't know. So I didn't bother giving her my password. I'm sorry if what I did was wrong - But after what she said about me to Fresa all afternoon, you'd think I'd be mad right!

Besides, maybe I'm paranoid, but I don't want her to use MY email address, with MY name on it, to send it a VERY LATE ad to China Press. Who knows who she might CC it to. I just want to protect myself that's all.

6. At 11:15am on Saturday morning, I was still sleeping. Kristal from China Press called to say she still has not received the ad. According to her, Lalitha promised to despatch it over first thing Saturday morning but till now, still no sight. I told her to call Lalitha's mobile, but she said she's been calling for the past 30 minutes, and she can't get through.

I said to give me 30 minutes, I'll get up, and go over to the office to email her the ad. She said OK. A few minutes later, Lalitha called me, "Ad on the way," she said. She said I need not go into the office. The way she said it, it was more like trying to keep me out of this, not the "nah everything is settled, don't worry, you stay where you are lah!" type.

So I called Kristal and said that I'm going into the office no matter what, if the despatch arrives before my email does, call me. So when I was on the way to college, she called to say she got the ad.

7. About the Royalty Free and Rights Protected images... After I left the office that day, Fresa and Lalitha stayed back for a while more. Fresa told me the next day to be careful of Lalitha. Apparently, after I left the office that day, Lalitha called (assumingly Henry) to complain that I didn't tell her when I knew the pictures were RP pictures.

It was Lalitha who picked up the catalogues from Anna at her office. It was Lalitha who packed the books and sent it over to Puchong. It was Lalitha who directed Eric which pictures to scan and use from the catalogues. I only saw the end product when they presented it to the client.

Even that time, during the conversation with you, she kept saying I should have told her, or that Anna should have told her. But hey, come on. Let's be real - if you don't ask, who's gonna tell you? I've never even seen the catalogues Anna passed her, how was I supposed to know what pictures were they?

The first time I saw the book, I immediately knew it was not RF pictures simply because Royalty Free pictures all are themed like, "On Campus", "Hands", "Young people in Love", etc. Besides, the procedures of using image banks photos are always standard according to Anna. She will pass her clients a set of catalogues and etc. But when they decide to use a picture or propose a picture to the client, they will always call her FIRST before using it, before proposing the pictures to their client. If she's worked in huge agencies like Gray before, shouldn't she know these?

8. When Fresa tells Lalitha to double check certain things with me, Lalitha shows displeasure. Like the "Visitor Pass" incident that Fresa related to me. I was with Frank taking pictures. One of the maintenance guys came to our office and passed Lalitha an old sample of the Visitor Pass. Kit wants new ones designed. When Lalitha passed the job to Fresa, Fresa asked her, "What size? Any more details?" Lalitha said to, "just do lah!" Fresa asked her to check with me. She immediately said, "Why? You have to start from scratch anyway!"

These are merely the few incidences that really made me rather unhappy. I don't know what to do and I hope you do. But whatever it is that you do - I don't want you to mention that I've told you all these. I don't want to be seen as I'm backstabbing her now. I don't even know if I am but everyone basically wants to protect themselves.

Thanks for reading such a long email.



Doreen

Posted by Doreen at 2:31 pm



    

Friday, September 03, 2004

We Need A Mini Bar!

Despite the public holiday middle of this week making it a 4-working day week, it's been one heeeeeeeeeeeellluva ride! Do I like it? Hate it? Or what? Uhm. Honestly, I don't even know. There are times when it's thrilling and exciting and I just throw my hands up in the air and go "Wheeeeee!", and then there are times when I just wanna get off the ride and throw up in someone's face.

Oh well. Here's to another Friday *cheers*... *gulp*... *burp* HAHAHA. (Yeah right! I wish I had a mini bar in my office... Maybe I should propose this to Anderson, you know, increase the morale of staff.. *lol*)

It's almost 7pm on a Friday night. Of late, I have no life. I mean, who stays back in the office on a Friday night? And the best part, I have no plans. Uh oh. Very bad. Then again, I don't want an ultra-happening night. I just want a nice and quiet R & R. Well, gonna be working on Saturday and Sunday as well... So don't want nothing too strenuous.

I'm gonna talk about Jane again. Jane and Jill were once colleagues and became very good friends. Recently Jill left the job for another one. There was this one night, Jill brought her new friends along for a night out and asked Jane along. Jane hit it off real well with Jill's friends. Therefore Jane's new friends call her out at times, without Jill. Jane however always makes it a point to call Jill along should she go out with the friends but Jill always refuse time after time, always ending with snide remarks.

So anyway, Jill now harbours hatred towards Jane, for "stealing" her friends. Jane is hurt by Jill's actions.. seeing Jill's ugly true self is very hurtful and disappointing.

Who can we blame if certain people click better with some, and not so well with some? When you mix and match your friends, isn't this expected? Why do some people feel so inferior and feel the need to always be in the centre of attention, and have this mentality that you can't go out with them without me cos they are my friends first? You get my drift? Damn. I find this childish. Utterly childish.

But poor Jane, so torn and lost. She's been crying, and having dreams about this whole thing too! She even dreamt that she walked right up to Jill and erased all their contacts from her mobile phone and then said "Here, I'm giving you back your friends!" before walking off.

Great. Someone just pissed me off big time. Time to head off. Here's to a good weekend *cheers*... *gulp*... *burp* DAMN! WE NEED A MINI BAR IN THE OFFICE!

Posted by Doreen at 6:50 pm



    

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Who's the Enemy?

You will hear girls and women complaining about how men ill-treat them, or that men are such heartless jerks and ought to be banished to the bottom of the sea and never to resurface again.

Then again, these men are really not that cruel and heartless - as compared to women themselves! As a female, I feel ashamed saying this - I think us women are hypocrites. We have all these talk about girl power, uniting females all around the world, etc, but when it comes to bitching about one another, we are also the loudest and nastiest to complain about other females, as compared to our male counterparts.

WE are our own enemy.

Take for example, Jane, she just recently got herself a cK underwear lookalike model as her boyfriend. They will say: "They won't last long.. When he gets bored with plain Jane, he will chuck her aside!".. or "She must be real cheap, a cK underwear lookalike model like him never will go out with plain Jane!"

Then Jane loses some weight because she's been hitting the gym very often. So they will go: "Oh my God.. Look at her bones! Do you think she's anorexic?"

So after breaking up with cK underwear lookalike model, Jane went for a make-over, new hairdo, change of wardrobe, etc. She now looks stunning and struts her stuff around with an air of confidence. What will they say then? "Oh look at her! She must be a real slut, first the cK underwear model lookalike.. I wonder who's she trying to bed next?"

Who says these things? Chances are it's the women.

Why do we feel a need to belittle people from our own sex? Why can't we feel happy when our girlfriend dates a cK underwear model lookalike? Why can't we be proud of her when she loses the extra weight around her hips and has now gotten a new hairdo and has taken to dressing up better? Why do we say nasty things about her?

Envy. Competition.

I think on the whole, women are more competitive than men. Men are laidback creatures who just want their beer, sports and sex. Anything else, they turn a blind eye and deaf ear to. To them, life is simple, blissful, if they have the 3 things.

Women have a stronger urge to outdo one another. Who snags a richer boyfriend? Who's got a bigger stone on the ring finger? Who lost 7 kgs in week? All that and more!

Now you know why the term bitches are specially reserved for us. Hmmm... I wonder what are the boys like, really?

Posted by Doreen at 4:34 pm



    

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

It's Hot and Juicy!

"What drives this hearty urge to tattle? Anthropologists, sociologists, psychologists have taken their turns with gossip. Is it a form of social control, some ask? Does fear of gossip keep people in line? The subjects of gossip can, after all, find themselves ridiculed, castigated or even exiled in some societies. Gossip can be a means of indirect aggression. It can serve to pass on bad news to a 'victim' whom we do not want to address directly.

Is gossip merely satisfying our morbid curiosity? Are we just looking for a good story? Gossip does allow us to make downward comparisons. When we talk about someone else's scandal or misfortune, we may feel better about our own circumstances. It can reinforce our own values and opinions. Researchers find that we tend to pass on those stories that are consistent with our views of particular people and their relationships

More important, perhaps, is the thrill of disclosure, the opportunity to be the first person to tell. The right bit of gossip can launch us into the centre of attention. Information is power. Gossip can feed into a competitive drive to enhance our status. It can bring us validation. We are in control as we enrapture an audience and trigger their emotions. Gossip is a powerful means to bonding. As we exchange 'stolen gifts' we reinforce our trust in each other. 'I can tell you.' Being 'in the know' can signal that we are in the clique, that we are one of a privileged few."


I'm not gonna deny that I don't gossip - I love gossiping! Especially those juicy ones regarding who's dating who and who's sleeping with who! HAHA. Hey c'mon, I'm only human.

So last night I got a tad bit upset. A colleague from work told me that someone told her they heard from others stories about me. Apparently, I'm not the nice girl I once was when I first started work here at this company. The story is "These days Doreen is not as helpful and cooperative as she was before".

Actually I don't deny that. After two years, you'd think I've learnt the ropes to survival don't you? You'd think that I would be more savvy and not allow people take advantage of me huh? Damn right!

In an organisation of about 300 staff, I'd have to select who to be helpful and cooperative to right? It IS a dog-eat-dog-world afterall. Sure I'll help you IF I have the time and resources to do so. Sure I'll definitely help you even more if I want to get into your good books. Sure I'll help you all the more if you determine my career advancement in this company.

But at the end of the day, I know that my conscience is clear. Plus, how can I satisfy everyone? There'll be some who think I'm great gal and then there'll be some who can't wait to beat the shit outta me.

True, I was a little bit upset when I heard about it last night. I kept thinking, "Oh no! How can people not like me?" I mean, everyone wants to be accepted right? So anyway, I did give it a thought. Whether driven by malice, envy or something else, gossip is inevitable anywhere.

On the other hand - Maybe there is a reason for them to start spreading gossip about me. Maybe I pose as a threat? HAHAHAH. Who knows? Their fears could be justified cos I'm good at what I do *laughs doubly hard*

Therefore, I'll resort to remain absolutely professional and pleasant. I shalt fight the urge to reduce them to poop because it will only make them more defensive. Then again, I don't know who started this gossip.

So what the hell.

Posted by Doreen at 4:47 pm