Monday, May 14, 2007

When Is It?

Do all couples have an anniversary?

Well, it's like this you see.

Him and me, we did not start off on a right note.

There was no act of courtship which had him wine and dine me. There were no bouquet of roses (or even a single stalk!) presented to me. Nor were there any "confession" about how he "likes" me and would thus like us to start dating seriously. Nope, nothing of that sort.

We were casual daters. Can I say that - casual daters?

Well, we were doing this whole on-and-off thing for years. In between he dated other people, I went to Australia, I dated other people too. When I was back for in Malaysia for holidays, we'd catch up and have lots of fun. Even upon my return to Malaysia for good, there was no concrete direction as to where we were heading, so we ended up casually dating again. For a while at least.

Anyways. To date, it has been 10 long years. But officially a couple only in the last 4.

"Where are we going?" has been discussed so many a times, and we have more often than not, failed to provide each other with an answer. Maybe I was scared. Maybe he was scared. Maybe we were scared. To commit. To say, "Yes, let's start doing this seriously". To say, "I am yours and you are mine".

Along the way, I realized that I liked him more than what I can afford. Dare I even say love? Nay, love is too big a word.

Along the way, I realized that I want to go out with him exclusively and that it rips my heart when he goes out with other girls.

Along the way, I wished I could call him "my boyfriend".

Along the way, I fell for him.

I don't know if fear ever evaporated, but it came to a point where I put my foot down and demanded an answer to "where are we going?". And, I gave us an ultimatum. It's either we start dating seriously and exclusively, or we stop seeing each other. Fortunately, we both agreed that we should give us a chance, a decent chance.

I remember that afternoon well enough. It was like any afternoon, a typical weekday in Kuala Lumpur, and we were supposed to be at work, at our respective offices. Instead, we were tucked away in a corner in Chili's at Midvalley. I remembered ordering a beer.

It's been 4 years since that afternoon in Chili's, since we became official. It's been 4 years, and we've never looked back. It's been 4 years, and we've never been happier.

So when is our anniversary?

That fateful afternoon in Chili's I hear you say?

Fuck me. I don't remember the date.

Posted by Doreen at 1:35 pm